Head's been swimming these last 2 days. Don't know why. A whole dizzy spell of a day. Driving's a little difficult but other than that ... life's good! Lawl.

Went and got my uniform + signed the contract today at Fitness First. I suppose I start training on the 5th of May. Can't wait to start earning the simoleons and getting my life going cause God knows it's fucking stuck. I'm in that little scene of Inception where Leo is getting chased by agents in Mombasa and he gets pinned in this tiny crease between buildings and he squeezes out. Yeah, kinda like taking a dump and being excreted out. Only, not so graphic and more metaphorical.

Yeah, I'm gonna lie down now :DDD

That being said, I got the job~

I am now a Membership Consultant at Fitness First Menara Summit. Now, if only I knew how to get to Menara Manulife in Damansara tomorrow for the induction process. Uh, GPS please?



Do take a listen to Tables by Talal Chaudhry. It's an old song but it really needs more recognition than just 239 views. It's a lot better than Deadmau5 IMO. It's not mainstream and it's just ... right. I love it.

A.J. Mohacsy (Australia) - Portfolio

Not that timing matters or that I'm practically back to bumming around the home (and that my health has been on a roller coaster of a ride as of late) while being jobless, but that feeling has struck again. The feeling where you look at others around you who have been so productive in their fields and lives while you've been stagnant in doing ... well, nothing! I've seen classmates of mine getting themselves up and moving in their lives and careers and are loving (a term to be used loosely) it. No doubt there have been hiccups along the way but they've still come a long way since. What have I achieved for myself? Nothing much I suppose. A month's worth of internship? I don't even know if a month is counted for anything here.

Another thought which attacks the recesses of my mind is that, I don't know if I want to stay in the design field for now. I just want a job to pay off some bills ... haha I make it sound like I'm supporting a family don't I? Nah, I mean just basic stuff like gym payments and car maintenance. Just to take whatever load I can off Mum & Dad. That being said, I suppose I could get a small part time stint somewhere for a while to gather funds which have nothing to do with my field of study. That's what bothers me. Would it mean that my 4 years of University have been all for nothing if I just take a job which has nothing to do with it? Not even a proper 9 - 5 one but just a college kid job just to pay off small debts ...

Who am I kidding? I'll take anything I can get I suppose. There's no room to be picky anymore.

Was never good at being sick. I suppose I was never good at being cooped up at home either. Now I'm going through both. A string of illnesses which ceases to come to an end and freedom which mocks me from outside the gates of this home. I feel like an animal ... a very sick one, being caged in with just food and water for survival. Ah, but I suppose being in this position has taught me many things: patience, appreciation for the smaller things, love for my habitat (I thought we'd still stick to the animal reference), humility, and to just slow down ... and to stop feeling bad for myself lol.

I wouldn't say I'm depressed, just thoughtful.

It's been a month since I've written. I don't even know how to summarize my month of May-April. I have all the words but they're just jumbled in between thoughts and fingers. Been interning for a month at Ganforhire. The internship period ends in a week. I've applied at different places so far. One thing I did learn at G4H is that I may not be cut out to be a designer after all. Yeah, when that sentence was given to me to ponder upon, I'll admit I was a little crestfallen. Not in a "the world has come to an end" way, but rather in a "what do I do now?" manner. I suppose I'll try out different industries which still plays a little to what talents I have. Question is, WHAT talents DO I possess? Hardly any now that I've roamed a little.

Can't wait to not work in Bangsar anymore. I don't hate the company, it's only because driving there every morning is a nightmare for me.

Another problem which has presented itself to me is my fitness level (or lack thereof). It's been a while since I've attended any gym sessions. I've gained a good stone or two I suppose. Clothes are getting a little stretched again and as you can imagine, I am freaking out. It's not that I've eaten more, I eat probably the same amounts I've always have, just not maintained my fitness. It feels strange to not have to wake up at 10 and haul ass to the gym anymore. I don't miss it but I know I need it. Oh, thighs!